26 March 2009

Women Whose Blogs at Which I Should Comment More Vigorously (and Flirtatiously) . . .

. . . so, over the weekend, Prof. Althouse made it official and revealed some details about her recent betrothment to a fine gentleman (by the handle of Meade) she met in part because he was an avid commenter on her blog.

So, as a single man, maybe I should explore this avenue of bliss more heartily, if it worked once, why shouldn't it work again?

I know inconstancy is a big turn off for women, so if I wanted this to be effective, I should probably limit this list to one name, but in fairness to all the wonderful and attractive women who blog, I'm not capable as of yet to limit my affections (a touch of reciprocity would go a long way into focusing my attentions, and intentions).

So here's a list in no particular order, with reasons for, and against, of bloggers whom I might pitch woo.

Moxie
Conservative, check, gorgeous, check, creative, check, smart, check, drives a Porsche, big fat check, lots of positives going for her, she could post a bit more often, but I'm sure she's doing other things, so it's understandable. Now some reasons why I might hesitate, blonde, sorry, I just don't find blondes aesthetically pleasing for the most part, it's a peculiarity of mine, for the right woman I could look past it, and celibacy, now that isn't necessarily a drawback, it would mean that any relationship would move forward strictly based on intellect and emotions with the physical stuff limited until we are both ready for a serious commitment, I'd like to say that's a positive, but the horndog in me used to relationships proceeding physically fairly quickly would probably get frustrated.

Tammy Bruce
Conservative, check, gorgeous, check, creative, check, smart, check, loves animals, big fat check, lots of positives going for her, and really just one minor negative. OK, so that one negative is more a problem regarding me, being non-distaffed and all, and unfortunately that's not something one can overlook easily. I guess it's true, all the good ones are taken, or gay.

Felicia Day
Gorgeous, check, creative, check, smart, check, loves D&D, big fat check (I've never played myself, but I'd be willing with the right group of geeks), lots of positives going for her, and really just one big negative, that she's probably a big fat liberal. Having dated people in or interested in 'the business' in the past, I'm not sure it's something I want to repeat. It's tough on people's psyche and all the crap they deal with tends to come home with them, I would imagine it would be even harder on a woman just shy of 30 who enjoys a strange mix of big success in one market segment and near anonymity with the mainstream. I'd be shocked if she's not ever so slightly neurotic, but I'd probably enjoy being a stabilizing rock with which she could anchor herself to the real world (and those pics with her and firearms, as Conan would say, rowwwwwwrrrrrrrrrr!!!)

Kat Dennings
Gorgeous, check, creative, check, smart, check, endearingly quirky, big fat check, lots of positives going for her, and one huge almost deal breaking negative, she's way too damn young for me to even consider thinking about in a romantic manner. Normally, I'd consider any woman under the age of 25 a big huge fat no-no, but there's just something so interesting about her that I'd be willing to risk corrupting her and negatively influencing her development as a person (most of these flings between guys pushing, or past 40 and girls barely past 21 do harm to both parties). It's those damn YouTube videos she used to make, she comes across as so charming that I'm willing to throw my scruples out the window. (I have to admit it, it's also her big huge . . . ., eyes that stir my passions)

Heather of Go Fug Yourself
Gorgeous, unknown, creative, check, smart, check, endearingly snarky and completely obsessed with pop culture, big fat check, lots of positives going for her, as to the negative, she may not actually look like Joan Collins circa 1982. Seems like being around her might bring my inner Blackwell to the fore, which probably wouldn't be that sexy and could be really confusing sexually for both of us. Can a straight man snark on fashion and be sexually enticing simultaneously? It would be an interesting experiment. I think Heather's writing style is slightly better than Jessica's, but if it turned out that I was more compatible with Jessica rather than Heather, I'd have to attempt the very tricky blogging version of the infamous "Roommate Switch". Better men than I have lost limbs trying that maneuver.


Better start working on those commenting/flirting skills, before others beat me to the punch, and to all the bloggers out there I didn't list, it's not you, it's me, really.

No comments: