Yeah, Sure, with a $4000 Camera and a $7600 Lens, I Could Take Shots That Good, Too...

Robert Scoble, the Scobleizer, is at the Twitter 140 conference, and he rented a huge honking lens (photo by Brian Solis) to cover it.

Yes, I'm jealous, and yes, the pics he's taken look fantastic.

But, though I'm enjoying taking snaps and have no problem walking around with $1100 worth of camera body and lenses (that's the $850 Nikon D5000 with kit 18-55mm lens plus the $250 55-200mm zoom), I'm not ready to step up to the big leagues and carry kit worth the same as a brand new econobox (also that Canon 600mm lens looks like it weighs about as much as a Kia Spectra, too).

So, Rob Zombie, Malcolm McDowell, and Weird Al Yankovic Walk Into a Bar . . .

. . . and then the bartender said, "I don't even own a duck!"

(sorry, you'll just have to imagine the rest)

(but you won't have to imagine those three posing for the same picture, cause it's right here from Weird Al's twitpic fed)

Now even Weird Al is tweeting, this is getting out of hand.

The Badass MF Awards (First in an Irregular Series)

So, John Hawkins of Right Wing News tweeted this:

"The great danger to the consumer is the monopoly -- whether private or governmental. His most effective protection is free competition." MF

I readily deduced that the MF in question had to be the inestimable Milton Friedman. So in response I tweeted the following (which Ed Driscoll kindly retweeted, thanks Ed)

MF=Milton Friedman, of course, I think he should always be referred to as Badass Milton Friedman (or Badass Mofo, for short)

If any economist ever earned the title Badass, it certainly must be Milton Friedman, and that'd be the case even if his initials weren't MF.

Surely there are other MFs that deserve to always be referred to as the Badass MF, so here at Immodest Proposals it's time to bestow the Badass MF Award to the baddest assest MFs in a variety of categories. Some are transcendently badass, others may have earned their badassness somewhat by default, but all are, in one way or another, Badass MFs. To inaugurate this honor, I'm going the presidential route.

U.S. Presidents
And the nominees for Badass MFs amongst current and former Presidents are:

George Washington for being our first, and a man who followed Cincinattus' example when he could have easily gone the despot route.

Abraham Lincoln for correcting a horrible wrong, waging a horrible but just war, and preserving the Union against great odds.

Calvin Coolidge for saying more with his silences than most Presidents do with all their yapping.

Millard Filmore for actually having the initials MF (and for not much else)

Ronald Reagan for being a force of nature, reshaping an entire generation of American politics and righting the wrongs of his immediate predecessor.

And the winner is, George Washington, sorry Millard, you may be the only MF, but you aren't the baddest of the badass MF Presidents, that'd be our first President, hands down, no real contest.

The Dangers of An Unattended and Logged In Twitter Account (When Combined With Having Brothers in the Vicinity)

First Felicia Day fell victim to her brother posting while she left her twitter feed logged in and unattended (screencapped above, read from bottom to top)



Then Sarah Lane's bro committed similar shenanigans.

Let this be a warning, log out, and watch your laptop or phone when out and about, especially when you are partying up a storm at the SXSW shindig.

If Leo Laporte Pointed It Out on Twitter, I Guess I Won't Be a Misogynist to Embed the Video Here...

A collection of European women, driving (poorly).

(via Leo Laporte, in turn who tips his cap to ds1069, so any women who want to point out how unfair this portrayal of women drivers is in the above video, please direct your complaints to Youtube user, ds1069, and given that he lists his location as Ukraine, I wouldn't be at all surprised if he was a touch misogynistic himself)

(prejudice against women is a bad thing, prejudice against people who are presumably ethnic Russians or Ukrainians, that's OK, cause those dudes deserve it)

A New Irregular Immodest Feature: ADVENTURES IN TWEETING (Lilyroseallen Edition)

A series of tweets today from Lilyroseallen:

Just had a power nod

Power nod is : a.) The opposite to Paranoid.
b.) A method of looking extremely interested whilst being interviewed.
c.) Championship level felatio. Answers on a postcard to.

I'm guessing B is the correct answer, but both A and C are intriguing (also, major props for the use of the word, "whilst" in a tweet).

The Awesomeness That is THE REAL SHAQ

Just a few of his tweets from today:

Went to a horse style cirk us dolay show called cavalia, very impressive
(translation, 'went to Cavalia, a show that in some ways reminds me of Cirque du Soleil, though instead of acrobats and contortionists, you have horses')

Bout to go to bed tonite, gotta b ready for da kobster and da lakers,
(translation, 'After getting our asses kicked in Los Angeles Thursday by the Los Angeles Lakers, I fear we're about to suffer another thrashing by their hands in front of our hometown patrons')

People n phoenix u have 5 min to touch me I have 2 laker tickets n my hand I'm on a corner at a bus stop
(translation, 'I'm lonely')

How To Turn Tweets Into Twats . . .

Twitter is for 'tweeting', not 'twatting'.

Both Lily Allen and Perez Hilton are acting a bit twattish with their tweets lately. But, I'm totally on Lily's side on this one, even if she is being a bit of a twat.

(and saw Lily on Leno last night, sounded great, looked great, and just downloaded her new album from Zune Marketplace today, so far it's a solid sophomore effort)

So Lily, if you're still in L.A., look me up, I'd love to show you around to the non-tourist-y, non-celebrity haunts hereabouts (and since you've said you are done with older men, it'd be completely platonic, I'm cool with that).

And here's her twitter handle, lilyroseallen, if you want to follow her, and The (self proclaimed) Queen of All Media, Perez Hilton, can be followed at, Perezhilton.

UPDATE: I take back the whole 'platonic' thing, now that I know Allen is an In-N-Out aficionado, I think I'm in love.

At Some Point in the Near Future, This Might Not Be a Joke . . .

Some joker created a twitter account for the White Bentley involved in tonight's as yet unresolved low speed car chase.

UPDATE

The joker inside the car, is most likely DJ Khaled, now let's see how long before his wiki is updated with the chase info, [update within an update] OK in the time it took for me to search wikipedia for his page, someone has already put in a line, but they should call it a slow speed, rather than high speed chase . . .

(and please don't mistake this idiot DJ Khaled with Khaled (or when he first started out Cheb Khaled) who is an awesome Rai singer)

See, Khaled singing Didi from his album Khaled from 1992, pretty awesome, right? Not bothering embedding any DJ Khaled or Terror Squad vids cause they're predictably idiotic.

2nd UPDATE:

DJ Khaled was not involved with this, he's doing fine and is in Miami, he still has many years of crappy rhymes ahead of him. The LAT has identified the person involved as a "businessman of Pakistani origin". He shot himself, and was taken to the hospital, his condition grave.

Wil Wheaton said it best when he tweeted:

Man, nothing ruins a good car chase like actual tragedy.

A Day's Worth of Tweets Ripped Out of Context

My tweets from February 4th, 2009 (less the @username and links to give context as to what I'm responding to or linking)


More owls, fewer rodents, the only owls out here are plastic or wooden, get hawks, though, even seen one grab a live rat before

I figure I should get a shot at the Raiders job sometime before 2015, I'm ready and waiting . . .

Life/Art Imitation?

Hire bad students as TAs? Brilliant!

Bill Gates, Misquito wrangler!

There's a dirty joke in there someplace, but I'm not touching it . . .

I believe, "oh snap" is exactly the correct response . . .

Misestimating distances where you don't live is pretty common. Europeans can't believe how spread out LA is when they visit.

Also, there's very little that can be said that can't be construed as risque, if one is inclined to see that side of things

Speaking of things that might sound a bit risque . . .

If She Wasn't So Hot, I Might be a Little Pissed Off . . .

On my phone recently:

Direct from mkhammer:

Hey there! Look forward to chatting with you about politics or, uhh, my dinner. It happens.

She's lucky she's so damn scrumptious, witty, and intelligent, or else I might be pissed off getting spammed on my phone.

Instead, I'll dream of showing her around town should she ever visit the Los Angeles area. I'm sure she didn't just spam all her followers, instead it's a real personal connection she feels towards me after she read my twitter account and my blog. I'm dead certain, that's the case.

(and that's a sincere offer, she just needs to email me, and I'll be ready to be her chauffeur/tour guide)

UPDATE:

(how could I not upload her latest bit of YouTube fun?)

Maybe the Kutchers Aren't So Liberal Afterall . . .

MrsKutcher tweeted today:

No school today so out treasure hunting with my girls!

If Ashton and Demi (and Bruce, blended family and all, sure he helps choose the schools, too) are sending their younger children to schools that take off Reagan's Birthday, guess they aren't the total liberal tools that they sometimes seem.

(obviously leave Bruce out of the liberal tool part of this post, given that he's one of the few Hollywood conservatives that is 'out' about his conservatism)

And as apropos of it being February 6th, it's a good time to reflect upon the utter crappiness of the late 70s, and the extreme awesomeness of Reagan and how he rescued us from Carterian (or is that Cartesian?) malaise.

(it's especially appropriate given that our current President seems enamored of Carter-like pessimism and social programs)

Also, eat some damn Jelly Belly's.

(and the photo at the top of this page was found at this USA Today article, and the original artwork can be viewed at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in beautiful Simi Valley)

How You Know "The Real Shaq" is the Real Shaq . . .

Tweeted recently:

Thank u all 4 da votes,witout u there is no me

Congrats, Shaq, you've earned your return to All Star status, you've been playing with energy, and you're even making your free throws lately, keep it up and you'll get your team all the way to a 1st or 2nd round sweep by the Lakers (unless the Spurs sweep the Suns out of the playoffs, first), enjoy it.

Turns Out Every Adam Ant Song is About Nazis . . .

Tweet from Lileks upon the occasion of watching Downfall:

Hitler sorta answered Adam Ant's question - "Don't smoke, don't drink - what *do* you do?"

Combine his observation with my previous post about the ethics of sexual relations with Nazi chicks, and seems that two points make a line.

Other Adam Ant songs that are actually about Nazis (and/or Hitler):

Place in the Country: All about Berghof

Crackpot History and the Right to Lie: All about Mein Kampf (nothing but a load of lies and crackpot history)

Puss 'N Boots: (Nazi officers were a bunch of preening nancies who loved to shine up their leather boots)

I'm sure there's more, but a clear pattern does seem to emerge if you peer closely enough to the subtext of Antmusic.

Did you really think I'd mention Downfall, Twitter, post a YouTube clip, and not embed the Downfall parody about a Twitter outtage?

Had I Carried Out My Plan, I'd Have Alcohol Poisoning About Now

Twittered earlier before watching tonight's LOST 2-parter:

Proposal for a LOST drinking game: Stabbing=shot, Shooting=2 shots, Matt Fox looking constipated=finish glass (could get real drunk)

Even sober I lost track of how much alcohol consumption those instructions would have caused. I believe the technical term is "awholehellofalot". I had assumed the last instruction would be the killer, but turns out the first two would have caused the consuming of mass quantities (and without a native of Remulak's constitution, that could be dangerous).

Must reformulate the rules before actually engaging in any LOST drinking games, fun is fun, but proceeding with a bit of prudence can prevent a lot of pain.

Also, that episode did not suck. It did not suck, hard.

(I'm assuming it's understood that using 'hard' as a qualifier in this context means that this episode did not suck even more than just plain not sucking, and if I trusted that this show wasn't going to go off the rails again in a few episodes, I would be inclined to say that this two parter was quite good)