26 May 2006

The 15 Most Dirtiest, Hippiest, Commieist, Pinkoist Rock Songs of the Last 40 Years

Seems this John Miller list of songs won't die. The discussion at Althouse seems rather lively.

I thought I'd take on the opposite project. Which rock songs since 1966 best epitomize Dirty hippie, commie pinko sensibilities (yet are still by artists that I still respect, love, admire (with the obvious exception of ALW 'aka' Satan), and even many of the songs on the list still are pretty great, despite being damn dirty hippie songs)

This won't be easy to narrow down, the number of candidates is tremendous, and my knowledge of the dirty hippie commie pinko musical nexus isn't as complete as my knowledge of other genres, but I'll do my best.

Counting down from 15 (Why fifteen songs, why not?) here's the list, with explanations.

15. The War Song, Culture Club. To know this song is to admit to having had this album. Well I know this song, and I had it on vinyl. This was the beginning of the end for this band. Their first two albums were and still are pretty amazing. This one, not so much. And this song, well read the lyrics, and laugh, cry, whatever.

14. Woodstock, Joni Mitchell. She's one of the all time greats. This isn't one of her all time great songs. She wasn't even at Woodstock, yet she recorded this silly little song, makes the list cause it's about Woodstock, which was one of the dirtier, hippier, pinko commier events of the last 50 years.

13. Excuse Me Mister, Ben Harper. From the Fight for Your Mind album, a great essential album that should be in any music collection, but it's still commie agitprop, nevertheless. When he stopped being a pinko socialist agitator, he became less interesting musically, sometimes it's good to be commie pinko scum (artistically speaking).

12. America Eats Its Young, Funkadelic. The title speaks for itself, really. If that doesn't sound commie pinko and dirty hippie to you, than I don't know what does.

11. Television: Drug of the Nation, Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy. I admit it, I loved this album. It's a great socialist screed against all that is capitalism. Useful idiots that they were, they still managed to construct some damn good beats.

10. Two Tribes, Frankie Goes to Hollywood. Another great song, but still commie pinko agitprop that suggests Ronald Reagan had an itchy trigger finger on the nuclear button.

9. I'd Like to Buy the World a Coke, Hillside Singers or The New Seekers. Sure this song was written and conceived as a commercial for one of the biggest most imperialistically capitalist products of our time, but it's still a bunch of dirty hippie touchy feely nonsense.

8. Jesus Christ Superstar, Andrew Lloyd Weber. Satan, thy name is ALW. Jesus reimagined as a dirty hippie popstar. Gross doesn't even begin to describe what this is. I can't single out any one song, so let's just call the whole project one long dirty hippie nightmare.

7. Bold as Love, Jimi Hendrix. Just cause he was one of the all time greats doesn't mean his insipid lyrics can escape scorn. I defy anyone not stoned out of their mind on numerous substances to explain what this song is really about.

6. Walking Down Madison, Kirsty Maccoll. Your typical, anti-capitalist screed against the victimization of the downtrodden. But it's a fantastic song, and Kirsty MacColl kicked all sorts of ass. Love this song, but it's still pinko to its core.

5. Going Down to Liverpool, The Bangles or Katrina and the Waves. Another song I love, but all about being on the dole. Rather than telling these tossers to get off their duff and make themselves useful, it just encourages more wankery. The Bangles version was banned by the BBC, though the Katrina version managed to get the OK, guess it's OK for Brits to sing about unemployment, but not Yanks.

4. Animal Kingdom, Prince. Good song from a forgotten and ignored album (off the 4th disc of the 4 disc version of Crystal Ball). The biggest most dirtiest hippiest pinkest commiest agitators are those crazed PETA folks, and this is a PETA anthem. But any song that combines acoustic guitar, dolphin squeaks, Prince scatting, and a scarily good bass line can't be all bad, despite silly politics. (did I mention that this song has the line, " So I don't eat no red meat or white fish
Or funky, funky blue cheese "?)

3. Mercy Mercy Me (The Ecology), Marvin Gaye. Sweet Jesus is this a fantastic song. Marvin Gaye's voice is pure velvet. The soundscape for this song is a lush jungle of soothing sounds. But the lyrics, the lyrics, the lyrics. Things ain't what they used to be. Actually compared to then, things are far, far better, but don't tell that to a certain former Vice President, some truths are inconvenient.

2. Grateful Dead. No song picks here, just there entire oeuvre. Not like when they played in concert you could easily differentiate one song from the next anyway, and all those damn dirty hippies couldn't care less.

1. Imagine, John Lennon. There can be no other number one on this list. Insipid, ridiculous, often quoted by the dirtiest and commiest of the pinkos and the hippies. It's a cliche wrapped in a trite tune wrapped in a collectivist worldview. Joel Engel writing in The Weekly Standard ripped that sorry excuse for a song a new one quite thoroughly, but all I can say about Imagine is Grrrr! Arggggh! (words fail, though this chap tries, the comment section over there is priceless)


Pastor_Jeff said...


Good list. You're definitely right about #1. No quibbles, just a few suggested additions.

"War" by Edwin Starr.
Probably the most successful anti-war song ever. You can really rock with this one if you don't acutally listen to the hippy-drippy lyrics. Awesome proto-funk guitar anthem with ideas just as stupid and naive as John Lennon's.

"The Way It Is" by Bruce Hornsby.
Beautiful piano and vocals on top of cynical liberal whining. We need more welfare! Every employer is a racist! Damn those greedy limousine conservatives!

"What I Am" by Edie Brickell and New Bohemians.
Not a classic for the ages, but a big pop hit. Stupid drugged-out hippie raving at "the man" with his religion and philosophy. Pfft. Like, whatever. I know what I know. The album was released on special patchouli-impregnated vinyl.

Just about anything by Neil Young.

Pastor_Jeff said...

Oh, and "Give Peace a Chance" also by J. Lennon.

From the Wikipedia entry:

"Give Peace a Chance" was the first single recorded by a solo Beatle, although it only reached number 14 on the pop charts in America and was kept out of the top slot in England by the Rolling Stones' "Honky-Tonk Woman."

"... a truly kick-a** song," he added.

Yes. There is justice in the world.

Icepick said...

"What I Am" by Edie Brickell and New Bohemians

Henry Rollins once said of that song, "That's college music, for college students." Rarely have I heard a voice drip with such bemused contempt!

dave said...

not hippie but instead postpunk, the Gang of Four was as Marxist as music's ever gotten- not just as a band but as a mission - nearly all their songs are critiques of capitalism and the society of the spectacle. songs about sex as capitalist exchange, the inability of average people to make progress, and the dialectical nature of history. and the now-too-close-to-home yelled chant of "Guerilla War Struggle Is The New Entertainment!", which became the definition of our times abour four and a half years ago.

punk and its offshoots have LOTS to offer on the lefty-radicalism angle... and this list (unlike the conservative one) should open itself up further beyond the canon (canons are so conservative)

Pooh said...

But, Dave, I don't think you can call punk "Hippie" - how long do any of the Scooby Doo kids last in the mosh pit?

(excellent call on the Dead btw. I HATE the frickin Dead.)

XWL said...

As far as putting Gang of Four on the list, sometimes folks try too hard.

I almost included the Communards on the list, but their actual songs weren't all that political.

Just like not putting Audioslave or Rage Against the Machine on the list.

It's so obvious that it goes without saying.

And I don't dislike hippie-jam music entirely, other than ALW, I like all the music on this list (even Imagine).

(And all of Pastor Jeff's suggestions were quite good, too)

Pastor_Jeff said...

He's right! It's time for us all to focus our energy ... and get this hippie jam into full swing!