A 'modest' suggestion on marketing

AN OPEN LETTER TO TOYOTA'S MARKETING DEPARTMENT


Since I'm carless at the moment, and since I seem to have become Toyota boy lately (or at least google ads think so, all the links are toyota products) may I humbly suggest to the marketing geniuses at TOYOTA that with my dozens of daily readers I could influence their car buying decisions should you, say give me a different TOYOTA product each month for the year.

It will take some time to set up, so rather than pressuring you I'll just suggest ten models you can set me up with, which of course I promise to review extensively in this blog (and as I have INTEGRITY I won't promise positive reviews, just honest, thorough, and humorous ones)

MARCH, Lexus IS
A modest but sporty number, I'd do a 400+ mile roadtrip each weekend and blog extensively about the experiences.

APRIL, Scion xB
Give me a tricked out version of your box on wheels and I'll hit all the hotspots, play the 'scenester' and end the month at the Coachella Valley Music Festival. And if you hook me up with a quality Digital Camera, I'll photoblog the hell out of your vehicle and the fest, which should draw plenty of traffic and eyeballs to your product.

MAY, Toyota Tundra
I'm not a truck fan, but I'm willing to make sacrifices for the sake of commerce and art. I'll end the month with a Memorial Day Weekend getaway to Las Vegas and I'll take the desert roads through Death Valley into Sin City instead of the boring old I-15 way. (with photos and Fear and Loathing style ramblings of debauchary and visions in the desert)

JUNE, Toyota Yaris Liftback
Give me an early model of this baby and if it is the solid, fun, little people mover that it appears to be I'll praise it to the heavens (I had an '88 Corolla FX (the one linked is much nicer than mine was) that I drove the hell out of and despite it's lack of power loved it's willingness to be ridden hard, I expect the same from the Yaris)

JULY, Toyota Solara Convertible
It's July, It's So Cal, you have to give me a convertible, or else.

AUGUST, Toyota Sienna
After sun and fun, a 'Soccer Dad' family van would be a change of pace. I could find some kids about to go off to college and help them set up in their dorms (and haul their junk in the spacious Sienna interior), and I'd happily blog the experience.

SEPTEMBER, Toyota Camry
Redesigned for '07, I'd take one of these and follow the Dodgers as they do their road trip during their pennant run (hope springs eternal). I'd start Sept 1st with their home game v. Colorado then hit the road and make it to Milwaukee to catch their game against the Brewers on the 6th. On the road again to make it to NYC for their Mets contest on Saturday the 9th, then back on the road to ChiTown to watch the Dodgers beat up on the Cubs on the 13th. After that I'd follow the Dodgers home and catch their last game of their homestand versus the Padres on the 18th. I'd attend and blog about the Dodgers exciting climb in the standings as they battle Pittsburgh and Arizona at home. I'd skip following the team to Denver, but I'd meet them again to end the month in San Francisco as they battle the Giants on the 29th and 30th. Make this happen, (and assuming the Dodgers have an actual pennant run in '06) and I bet I could wrangle up some real press coverage for this stunt.

OCTOBER, Toyota FJ Cruiser
The last of the three major new Toyotas for '07, I'd hit the mountains and enjoy the early ski season, even if I have to drive all the way to Utah to do it (the sacrifices I'm willing to make for free stuff, but again, don't expect a softball review, I'll be honest, I'm no whore)

NOVEMBER, Toyota Prius
Since I live in big fat liberal Santa Monica, what better car to have me tool around in but your green mobile? I'll hang out with Larry David at Izzy's Deli, talk rain forest preservation with Cameron Diaz, and help Heal the Bay clean up the beaches. (The environment isn't liberal or conservative, duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude)

DECEMBER, Toyota Crown Estate
Wagons are making a comeback in the U.S., And as it so happens the L.A. Auto Show will run again from December 1-10 this year (moving from their traditional early January dates to avoid competing against the Detroit show). What better way to get to know what the market would be like for a Lexus GS Wagon than for me to drive the Japanese equivalent to the show each day. I'm even willing to be a courtesy driver for any Toyota big wigs you may have visiting during the show.

So, what better way to drum up a year's worth of publicity than to lend 10 different cars worth hundreds of thousands of dollars to a blogger with dozens of daily visitors. I know your people will get on this right away. I'll be waiting for the EMail.



Now, failing this, dear Bugatti, your Veyron 16.4 isn't getting the press it should, so should you lend me one for a few months. . . . . . . . .